The Jazz Hole

FROM THE MAGAZINES #4

Mon, 30 Nov 2009 13:06:02 GMT

San Diego - Exhibitor Jerry Rucker thought that X movies were seasonal. During the summer vacation, he switched from showing such films as ALL ABOUT SEX to family fare such as ROBIN AND MARIAN to give parents a place to take their children. Rucker says he lost $11,000 during that period. Now he's back to showing DEEP THROAT and BEHIND THE GREEN DOOR.

from BOXOFFICE magazine (October 25, 1976)

FROM BOOKS #8

Sat, 28 Nov 2009 11:01:05 GMT

Many learned churchmen argued that illness was God's punishment for sin, and the more unpleasant the disease the worse the sin. Since the fifth century leprosy had often been interpreted as the reward for sexual excess. One of the early Norman bishops of London, Hugh d'Orival, chose to be castrated in the hope of obtaining a cure but, according to William of Malmesbury, the only result was that he spent the rest of his life a eunuch as well as a leper.

- 1215 THE YEAR OF MAGNA CARTA by Danny Danziger and John Gillingham

FROM THE MAGAZINES #3

Sat, 28 Nov 2009 10:51:42 GMT

Here, plainly, was a man who, whether as writer, editorial eminence or anxious husband, found it impossible to relax, switch off or otherwise unbend, and who isn't above using even his fan-mail as an excuse to read pedagogic lectures. "I am very glad to send you my autograph" runs a note to a hapless American petitioner named Glen Walter Blodgett, "and hope in return for this trifling favour you will make me happy by ceasing to split infinitives."

from a review of THE LETTERS OF T.S. ELIOT VOLUME 2: 1923-1925, Valerie Eliot and Hugh Haughton (Eds), in PRIVATE EYE magazine (No. 1250, 27th November-10th December 2009)

FROM THE MAGAZINES #2

Sat, 14 Nov 2009 11:05:40 GMT

While Motty's commentating on the tennis at Wimbledon, Jack Nicholson wanders into the commentary box unannounced ("his receding hairline reminded me of so many nights in the cinema"). Then there are Johnny and Patrick Cobbold, one-time owners of Ipswich Town, who Motty visits at their country estate with Alan Parry in tow. Surveying the grounds, Alan asks: "How much of this do you actually own?" Johnny C shoots back: "All of it, you cunt." Motson points at a photo of a prewar shooting party and asks: "Who's that guy with your father?" Patrick exhales testily, "That's the king, you wanker." ..."Even though they came from aristocratic stock," smiles Motty, "they were as down to earth as you could imagine."

- Taylor Parkes reviewing MOTTY: FORTY YEARS IN THE COMMENTARY BOX in WHEN SATURDAY COMES (#274, December 2009)

FROM BOOKS #7

Sat, 14 Nov 2009 10:56:15 GMT

I liked the photographers, there is one who came in and said he was sent to do a layout of me. A layout, I said yes he said what is that I said oh he said it is four or five pictures of you doing anything. All right I said what do you want me to do. Why he said there is your airplane bag suppose you unpack it oh I said Miss Toklas always does that oh no I could not do that, well he said there is the telephone suppose you telephone well I said yes but I never do Miss Toklas always does that, well he said what can you do, well I said I can put my hat on and take my hat off and I can put my coat on and I can take it off and I like water I can drink a glass of water all right he said do that so I did that and he photographed while I did that.

- EVERYBODY'S AUTOBIOGRAPHY by Gertrude Stein, quoted in TWO LIVES by Janet Malcolm

FROM THE RADIO TIMES #7

Wed, 21 Oct 2009 21:16:54 GMT

'Face behind the voice' Gary Crowley

Secret skills: "I've designed a 60s-style desert boot - the Crowley Boot."

FROM THE RADIO TIMES #6

Wed, 14 Oct 2009 20:17:16 GMT

Sir Roger Moore ("Eyebrow-raiser who saw the funny side of 007") selects his three favourite comedy films:

1. NINOTCHKA Billy Wilder was one of the writers.
2. THE PRODUCERS Brilliant. Just brilliant.
3. SOME LIKE IT HOT A classic Billy Wilder. Undoubtedly one of his best. Billy was a friend, incidentally.

FROM THE MAGAZINES #1

Sun, 20 Sep 2009 08:26:07 GMT

Burt [Lancaster] and I met and got along immediately but we would always argue. He threatened to kill me twice actually when he got in a temper. He dragged me up by the pelvis screaming, "You cock-sucking arsehole British piece of shit!", the lot. Fuck me. But he remained a dear friend and he was a wonderful man so who cares if he tried to kill me a couple of times?

- Michael Winner in VICE (Vol 7 No 9)

FROM THE COMICS #2

Fri, 28 Aug 2009 05:53:49 GMT

Peppermint Patty: "If you wake up, but don't open your eyes, will the day go away?"

- from PEANUTS, January 10th 1972

POEM #1

Wed, 26 Aug 2009 21:59:50 GMT

191

The autumn breeze was light & bright. A small bird
flew in the back door and the beagle got it
(half-beagle) on the second try.
My wife kills fleas and feeds them to the dog,
five last night, plus one Rufus snapped herself.
This is a house of death

and one of Henry's oldest friends was killed,
It came on a friend's radio, this week,
whereat Henry wept.
All those deaths keep Henry pale & ill
and unable to sail through the autumn world & weak,
a disadvantage of surviving.

The leaves fall, lives fall, every little while
you can count with stirring love on a new loss
& an emptier place.
The style is black jade at all seasons, the style
is burning leaves and a shelving of moss
over each planted face.

- JOHN BERRYMAN

FROM THE FILMS #1

Wed, 19 Aug 2009 21:24:51 GMT

"It's wonderful to see things being born... to see them born... and to see them die."
- Kurt (Christopher Lee) in THE WHIP AND THE BODY (1963 Dir: Mario Bava)

FROM THE PAPERS #2

Wed, 19 Aug 2009 17:38:58 GMT

BOX POPS: WHAT YOU'RE SAYING ABOUT DRAGON'S DEN

I don't care how rich Peter Jones is; matching shirt, tie, hankie and stripy socks look cheap and common.
J Lewis, London W1

Are the hammy Dragons really frustrated actors? Imagine Theo as Baron Hardup, James as Wishy Washy and Deborah as the back end of a pantomime horse!
Michelle M, Glasgow

THE METRO (Scottish Edition)

from THE RADIO TIMES #5

Wed, 19 Aug 2009 05:58:41 GMT

LETTERS

Lay off Lorne Spicer! As Margaret Smally (15th August) does, I should find Lorne irritating, with her loud voice, funny laugh and odd clothes. But she brings her enthusiasm and good nature to TRASH TO CASH and CASH IN THE ATTIC: some of the other presenters are too posh, patronising and pretentious (naming no names), but Lorne is the genuine article.
Iris Herbert
Newcastle Upon Tyne

To suggest, as Barry Norman (RT, 1 August) does, that THE MATRIX is "a bewildering mish-mash of pretentious mumbo jumbo... apparently dreamed up by a fifth former on acid" is a little insulting, considering the fifth former in this case would be Plato. THE MATRIX is inspired to a degree by his allegory of the cave.
Pete Bowes
Dronfield Woodhouse, Derbyshire

FROM BOOKS #6

Tue, 11 Aug 2009 19:45:45 GMT

The entire day had been spent finding the item for Mr Tagomi, and Childan's bitterness and anxiety almost overwhelmed him as he watched the buildings pass. And yet - triumph. The separate skill, apart from the rest of him: he had found the right thing, and Mr Tagomi would be mollified and his client, whoever he was, would be overjoyed. I always give satisfaction, Childan thought. To my customers.

He had been able to procure, miraculously, an almost mint copy of Volume One, Number One of TIP TOP COMICS. Dating from the 'thirties, it was a choice piece of Americana; one of the first funny books, a prize collectors searched for constantly. Of course, he had other items with him, to show first. He would lead up gradually to the funny book, which lay well-protected in a leather case packed in tissue paper at the centre of the largest bag.

- THE MAN IN THE HIGH CASTLE (1962) by Philip K Dick

from THE RADIO TIMES #4

Tue, 11 Aug 2009 19:36:51 GMT

LETTERS

Was it audacity or just stupidity that persuaded WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? (Wednesday BBC1) to commence the latest run with the stories of Davina McCall and Chris Moyles? I had become afraid that the remaining episodes would contain the life stories of Katie Price, Jeremy Kyle and Kerry Katona. Thank heavens, then, for the ever-lovely Kate Humble.
Steve Killy
Northampton

Miranda Sawyer's article about "the same old faces" (RT, 1 August) had a glaring omission in the list of names. Hasn't she noticed the number of times the irritating Lorne Spicer turns up in antiques/collectables/junk programmes? We often get back-to-back Lorne at lunchtime, and recently have been seeing her three times every day!
Margaret Smally
Ripley, Derbyshire

FROM BOOKS #5

Mon, 13 Jul 2009 20:24:42 GMT

On the evening of that day in Sheffield when Henry James read THE AMERICAN to the company he saw a performance of THE SCHOOL FOR SCANDAL. After the curtain had fallen he went round to my father's dressing room. For some minutes James sat in a contemplative silence. At last my father, in the way of the actor-manager, asked him how he had enjoyed Sheridan's comedy.

'A curious old play', said Henry James slowly. 'A very curious old play', he repeated in a tone that revealed his astonishment that such a play could still be put on the stage. And that was the only comment he made.

- COMPTON MACKENZIE, quoted in THE LEGEND OF THE MASTER: HENRY JAMES AS OTHERS SAW HIM by Simon Nowell-Smith (1947)

FROM THE PAPERS #1

Wed, 01 Jul 2009 17:12:12 GMT

REMEMBER JACKO AS ICONIC FIGURE

Michael Jackson's autopsy report does not make easy reading.

Emaciated, bruised, bald and ravaged by drugs, his body was in terminal decline long before his fatal overdose.

Yet somehow he managed to dress impeccably, maintain a unique look and hold his head high on his rare public appearances until the end.

- Martel Maxwell, The Scottish Sun

FROM BOOKS #4

Tue, 09 Jun 2009 19:37:46 GMT

'A quick test of the assertion that enjoyment outweighs pain in this world, or that they are at any rate balanced, would be to compare the feelings of an animal engaged in eating another animal with those of the animal being eaten.'

- 'On the Suffering of the World' by Arthur Schopenhauer

FROM BOOKS #3

Sat, 25 Apr 2009 09:38:31 GMT

'I have frequently told you, and the holidays just past have convinced me, that my prime has truly begun. One's prime is elusive. You little girls, when you grow up, must be on the alert to recognize your prime at whatever time of your life it may occur. You must then live it to the full. Mary, what have you got under your desk, what are you looking at?'
Mary sat lump-like and too stupid to invent something. She was too stupid ever to tell a lie; she didn't know how to cover up.
'A comic, Miss Brodie,' she said.
'Do you mean a comedian, a droll?'
Everyone tittered.
'A comic paper,' said Mary.
'A comic paper, forsooth. How old are you?'
'Ten, ma'am.'
'You are too old for comic papers at ten. Give it to me.'
Miss Brodie looked at the coloured sheets. 'TIGER TIM's forsooth,' she said, and threw it into the waste-paper basket. Perceiving all eyes upon it she lifted it out of the basket, tore it up beyond redemption and put it back again.

- THE PRIME OF MISS JEAN BRODIE (1961) by Muriel Spark

FROM BOOKS #2

Wed, 15 Apr 2009 17:39:42 GMT

"Be so good as to let me know what is going on in the house", he said to her, in a tone which, under the circumstances, he himself deemed genial.
"Going on, Austin?" Mrs Penniman exclaimed. "Why, I am sure I don't know. I believe that last night the old grey cat had kittens."
"At her age?" said the Doctor. "The idea is startling - almost shocking. Be so good as to see that they are all drowned. But what else has happened?"
"Ah, the dear little kittens!" cried Mrs Penniman. "I wouldn't have them drowned for the world!"

- WASHINGTON SQUARE (1880) by Henry James

FROM THE COMICS #1

Mon, 13 Apr 2009 10:22:06 GMT

From your hidden vantgage-point, you WAIT...You WATCH...And you hear the words of the one called IRON MAN...

THE INVINCIBLE IRON MAN: Ladies and Gentleman of the PRESS...May I have your attention please...
The noted industrialist TONY STARK has donated the facilities for today's CHESS MATCH...
...And Thor's mystic HAMMER has ceremoniously started the fuctioning of NIMROD.
NIMROD: the amazing new COMPUTER whose inventors believe it capable of defeating even the GREATEST human chess-masters at their own game!
Because of the SYMBOLIC IMPORTANCE of this match--of MAN VS. MACHINE--The Avengers agreed to serve as HONOR GUARD for this six-game tournament.

THE MIGHTY THOR, GOD OF THUNDER: Leave them no doubts, my friend, that our sympathies be e'er with the MORTAL--and ne'er the MECHANISM.

THE VISION (an android): THERE each Avenger must speak only for himself ASGARDIAN.

- from 'Five Dooms to Save Tomorrow!', AVENGERS #101 (Marvel Comics, 1972). Stan Lee presents: wonderment anew by Harlan Ellison (story/plot), Roy Thomas (adaptation/script), Rich Buckler (art), Dan Adkins (inker), John Costa (letterer). Based on an original story (c) 1964 by Harlan Ellison.

from THE RADIO TIMES #3

Thu, 09 Apr 2009 20:19:45 GMT

EX-CHAMPION RACER STEVE PARRISH
...well, you can never discount Rossi. That man is the complete package. When all the others (sic) riders have maxed-out their brains, Rossi is still on top.

WHISPERING BOB ('MOCK ROCK') HARRIS
I get to watch things like HANNAH MONTANA and ZOEY 101 on Nickelodeon. I really like them, too, and I love HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL!

FROM BOOKS #1

Thu, 09 Apr 2009 20:10:18 GMT

I had a second slug to fortify my nerves. Then I got Mrs Marburg's cheque out of the safe. I tore it into small pieces and tossed the yellow confetti out the window. It drifted down on the short hairs and the long hairs, the potheads and the acid heads, draft dodgers and dollar chasers, swingers and walking wounded, idiot saints, hard cases, foolish virgins.

- final paragraph of THE INSTANT ENEMY (1968) by Ross Macdonald

DYLANLOLLOLOLOLOGY #1

Wed, 08 Apr 2009 17:54:02 GMT

DON WAS, PRODUCER OF BOB'S 'ROUTINELY UNDERRATED' UNDER THE RED SKY ALBUM (1990):
My job as a producer is to create an “inspiration-friendly environment”. How did I apply that to Bob? With a very light touch, man, very light. Trying to manufacture too much of a scene would have been a bad plan. I don't think that coloured lights and Indian tapestries would've unleashed a torrent of creativity from a savvy cat like Bob.

I decided to broach the subject matter of the song by asking about the last verse - the one about the river running dry. “Is this song about ecology?” I asked him. “No, but it won't pollute the environment”, he answered without missing a beat.

from THE RADIO TIMES #2

Tue, 31 Mar 2009 19:52:26 GMT

ADVERTISEMENT
JULIA BRADBURY: I'd be an otter. They're svelte, nimble, sleek, clever and foxy. They also live on the edge.

LETTER
I walked into a room and was treated to the sight on the TV of Heston Blumenthal disembowelling living, struggling mackerel, then throwing them into a bucket to die. I've caught fish for eating, but have always afforded them the dignity of a rapid dispatch by a blow to the head.
Tony Perridge, Inverness